Children of divorce dating Chat avenue
As a child of divorce growing up in the 1980s, I was acutely aware that my parents’ decision to end their marriage meant that I was doomed to suffer serious and lasting negative effects—including academic difficulties, behavioral problems, and psychological issues.
This was the period following the rise in divorce rates in the U. (in the 1970s), and the “crisis perspective” of divorce was rapidly becoming part of our collective consciousness.
The bottom line is we play an active part in constructing our own marriages, and therefore have an active part in determining their success. It's rarely just ONE person is awful and the other person is a saint.
To get specific advice on steps to take to make your marriage successful, listen to my recent interview on I DO podcast, and watch for future blog posts here on Psychology Today. Often times people stop making time for each other.
While many scholars disagree with Wallerstein’s fatalistic assessment of young adults from divorced families, the fact remains that numerous empirical studies have found that those who experience a parental divorce are significantly more likely to divorce themselves.In fact, there is a substantial body of research on this phenomenon, sometimes referred to as the “intergenerational transmission of divorce.”Why does the outcome of your parents’ marriage likely affect the outcome of yours? First, many researchers have focused on parents as being important marriage role models.They argue that most of us model our own marriage after our parents’ marriage, and are therefore likely to experience the same result.They stop putting in effort and energy or they don't communicate anymore.Often times both parties aren't willing to compromise or do the work that is necessary to create a mutually beneficial relationship.
For example, in a recent nationally representative on-line survey commissioned by the USA Network (embed link), most of the 18 to 49-year-olds surveyed reported that their relationship was not like their parents’—rating their relationship as a 3.5 out of 10 in similarity (on a scale where 1 is nothing like their parents’ relationship and 10 was exactly like it).