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To your children, just the idea that you’re single and thinking about a new relationship can be depressing and hurtful.
It is natural to idealize the relationship between your parents, and adult children often object to the “replacement” of their father or mother.
It will be up to you to sit with your children and explain the different perspective that age brings.
You’ll need to help them see that you accept the risk of some pain for the joy that you’re likely to get from a romantic relationship. Do you remember the first time your child asked to take the car out on a Saturday night?
Tell them that the love of children and/or grandchildren can’t satisfy a person who needs love, romance, and companionship from a significant other.
Help them understand that you’re more than their parent – you’re a person as well.
Tell your children that you appreciate their concern, and that you want to let them help, but you need to define how that help will present itself.
In most cases, you can set your children at ease by explaining that you will be choosing your dates, and they will be meeting your dates within the first few weeks.
Helping your children know that you appreciate this fact will set everyone at ease.In fact, some adult children will quietly endure a dating relationship and speak out only when a marriage proposal is revealed.The idea being that dating is one thing, but MARRIAGE feels like an official replacement of their parent.On a logical level this may not drive a child to say to you, “Mom, I don’t want you dating,” but their behavior may reveal a subconscious attempt to sabotage your efforts.They may come up with odd objections, or being unwilling to help you make the time and resources to date.
After all, you don’t want to end up in an unpleasant relationship either.